Mental Health Awareness Month but not if people act out and mess up.
Everybody is against child abuse but a lot of people don’t know that it’s one of the biggest causes of BPD and that we should be given more empathy. At least, in words, as in “this person is suffering, acting out”.
“Copy and paste this status for suicide prevention” and yet, one of the conditions that has a high rate of it is BPD and many people don’t stand for us, even actively hate us.
“I have X but I have never done Y”. This is a formula of sentences that I see all the time. People want to be validated as “the good mental illness sufferer” because they already suffer enough discrimination. They want to disassociate from the behavior of the other person who also suffers from the condition. But, many times, that formula applies to them, too.
There should be more empathy. Mental illness can be extremely messy.
If it interferes with your life, it might interfere with your judgment. You do things that you might have not done otherwise. And maybe the commenter had a bit more discernment, which is a blessing.
Childhood can turn a normal kid into a not-so-nice person. They still deserve empathy. At least look at things like tragedies for both sides. The tragedy of a good person that could’ve been and never was, doomed to a jail cell.
They never wanted that. Had they known better, and been treated better, maybe things would’ve been different. We aren’t all dealt the same hand, the same DNA, the same spirit. But everyone deserves compassion.
My friends who work in education have seen sweet neglected kids turn into hardened criminals and they tried to support them. But it wasn’t enough.
They needed a warm embrace from a loving father that wasn’t there. Some more money to eat before school, a mother who cared, etc. And that hurt no one can take away from them.
Later in life, if they commit a crime, we should feel ok when they are caught but also feel the tragedy of another wasted life because of neglect, lack of love. But his parents probably also suffered from the same. It is an unending chain of events.
So who do we blame?
“I am X but I’ve never done Y”. You were one of the lucky ones, cherish that. Feel grateful but try to feel sadness for the one who did, for the wasted life, for the potential abuse they also suffered from.
People with cluster B personalities are hard to deal with many times but this is something that happened to us, not something that we consciously decided to do.
The narcissist didn’t decide to have a warped perception of reality. He just does. He didn’t choose to have those interpersonal relationship dynamics and life in general, he just believes that is what he should do. Though some are starting to look for help because their condition is destroying everything. Like us with BPD also ask for help because of the generalized chaos in our lives.
So it would be good to not follow the crowd and criticize so much. All the outrage for people’s actions. Tragedies that maybe could’ve been avoided by love and so on early in life, in the formative years. So is it fair or useful to add another comment to 100 comments blasting someone who is acting out, suffering, and shaped by trauma?
Trauma is so common. If you want people to understand yours, it’s only fair to try to be more gentle with others. At least, not add to the social media mob.
Obviously, one has cases that upset them more than others. Situations that affect them personally. In my case, I was able to feel compassion even then but I am like that, it helps me. You don’t have to, nor is it necessary. There are situations and then there are SITUATIONS. So I’m not guilt-tripping people into feeling sorry for everyone but everyone has a story.
And honestly, I feel empathy for everyone because I believe most people are good when they are born. Before their tragedies. And that makes me sad. It will always make me sad.